Not only do I go on Fail Dates, I'm also not married.

Wow! Its been almost a month since my last blog. What have I been doing?!?! Certainly not going on any successful dates. Fail Date DC is back! Aside from being extremely busy at my day job, one of the reasons I haven't updated this blog is because I went out on a date with a guy that I thought had some promise - at least the promise of another two dates or so. But, alas, I have simply given up on him.

I met him in a pretty unconventional way. I was out with friends on a Saturday afternoon, getting a head start on some summertime day drinking. What better way to spend a beautiful afternoon than inside a sports bar? As I sat down at the table, our waiter approached. He was hard not to notice, tall and handsome, huge smile, true perfection. "Oh my, " I said to my friend. "Now, that's a tall drink of water." Who says that? But it was true. I was in lust.

By the time the bill came, all of my other friends were aware that I thought our waiter, Sam, was cute. "Ha, I should totally leave my number on the receipt!" The second it came out of my mouth, I regretted it, because of course everyone thought that was a fantastic idea. I couldn't possibly do that!!! But then our waiter came back to the table, my friends and I started talking to him...I tried to lay on as much charm as I could muster, and then he gave me the sexiest smile ever. "Okay! I'm doing it!" I proclaimed as our waiter walked away again. I then proceeded to write a silly (almost creepy) note on the receipt about how I wanted to find out more about him and I left my cell number. The best part was when I noticed Sam was coming back, I threw the check on the table, and pushed my friends out of the way, stepped on someone's foot, almost tripped over a chair and ran out of the restaurant. I know how to leave a great impression.

The next morning, I received a text. It was from Sam! I couldn't believe it! Leaving your cell phone number on a receipt for a hot waiter to call you actually works! I had proven it! After about 20 texts back and forth later, he proposed we go to the movies that night. The first sign of the Fail should have been the incessant texting. After the movie we decided to get something to eat. We made small talk, and the subject of age was brought up. We discovered there was about a 5 year age difference between us. I'm 29 and, he, considerably younger. The age discussion was immediately followed by:

Sam: Doesn't it bother you that you aren't married?

Me: (30 seconds of silent shock, nervous laughter, and a quizzical look) No, of course not! What?! Me?! .... Um, does it bother you that you aren't married? (Trying to take the attention off of my singledom.)

Sam: No, I can probably get married anytime I want. I'm just waiting to get settled in my career.

Hmmm. Now I'm obviously writing this blog because I don't have a boyfriend or even an immediate glimmer or promise of a long term relationship. This frustrates me. BUT, I haven't yet started to panic about the possibility of never marrying (which is something I'm personally interested in accomplishing). Still, Sam's question was awkward and weird! Also, as I stared back at his dreamy face, I came to the conclusion that he probably COULD get married at anytime. That subject warrants another blog post entirely.

His weird, pushy questions continued throughout dinner, and at the time I was completely willing to overlook them, due purely to his hotness. We said a very "G Rated" goodbye, and went our separate ways. I left with the promise of a second date, which I was looking forward to, not so much for the oh so riveting conversation, but I really just wanted to kiss him.

So, due to my hectic work schedule and his inability and interest to make real plans (he usually texts me wanting to get together that night, and I'm a avid planner, so that just wasn't going to fly), I've given up on my dreams of a second date kiss with Sam. Plus, yesterday, after our 100th text, it finally occured to me that I wanted no part of his texting and weird "why aren't you married?" questions.

The End!